Angel With A Shotgun
by LeighSix
Summary: What if something happened at the end of Divergent? "Tobias pushes the barrel into my forehead. My tears have stopped and the air feels cool as it touches my cheeks. I reach out and rest my head on his chest to feel his heartbeat. At least his heartbeat is still him." Tris has one chance, but every chance comes with a price. Can she really kill Tobias?


**_Hey initiates! So, I came to a conclusion – I was wondering what would happen if in the control room, if Tobias never heard Tris? What if he pulled the trigger?_**

**_Anyways, this is my interpretation. I hope you guys like it. It's quite different._**

_Disclaimer: I do not own Divergent. If I did, Allegiant would have ended differently._

Tris' POV

"Tobias, please." I say. "Please, I know you're in there somewhere."

But if he really was, he wouldn't be coming at me like he was about to kill me for certain this time.

Tears make my face hot. I am pathetic for begging at the mercy of someone who can't hear me. "Tobias, please." I beg again, tears dripping and soaking my face.

Even when he scowls, his eyes look thoughtful, and I can remember how his lips curled when he smiled. It was beautiful.

I can't kill him. I know that for sure. I'm not sure if I love him; but I'm not sure if that's why I can't kill him. But nothing is worth his death – nothing, not after he saved me from the chasm. Not after he got separated from me by Jeanine. Not after he almost died at the mercy of Eric. I turned myself in because he could live, and I make a choice right now.

Tobias Eaton is not going to die today.

I have done this before – in my fear landscape. But this different; this is real. I can't break out of this simulation and wake up in a chair. No matter what happens, I am staring death cold in the eye at the hands of someone I swore to protect, someone I swore myself to, and someone that I do love. And that I do realize now.

I volunteered to die in that simulation, but this is real. This is real. But that's okay too. But I just know. I know what the right thing to do is, and I know what I have to do. I have to keep Tobias alive.

My father used to say there was power in self-sacrifice. I wonder what he would say now if he saw me doing this. I wonder if he and my mother are watching me from above.

I wonder what they would be saying to me. I know my mother, remembering how brave she was and how sharp her features were; how her blond hair curled roughly around the tips of her hair and how it draped down to my shoulders. This is something she would do. She was –is- brave, and she is Divergent.

And so am I.

I press the gun into Tobias' palm.

He pushes the barrel against my forehead, and the impact from him holding me shoves both of us down to the ground. My tears have stopped and his hand feels cool where it touches my cheek, his hand still roughly calloused. I watch his fingers curl around the tip of the gun. I knew from the beginning I couldn't beat Tobias in a fight. I couldn't reach the computer, or the gun. Now, my life is in the hand of the man I love.

I press my hand to his chest to feel his heartbeat. His heartbeat is still him. Everything about him I see physically is still him. I wish he could fight this. I wish he could fight this.

He clicks the bullet into the chamber and I close my eyes. Maybe it will be just as it was in the fear landscape. Maybe there will be a bang, and then everything will turn white. Maybe then I can find myself in another world with the people I lost. Maybe I can find myself in a world with Al and Will, and my parents. Maybe I can forgive to those I've harmed, and have a chance at friendship even on the other side.

I watch his finger curl around the trigger. "I love you," barely skips my lips in a light whisper, but if he had any chance of hearing me he would have broken out by now.

I lean my head back and close my eyes. Then, just as I thought, I hear a bang, and I feel nothing.

But in the distant hallow of another world, maybe the one I'm slipping from slower and slower. I hear another.

There is a blinding light near me, above my head. I finally manage to wedge my eyes open to a crevice, enough for the light to pour into my eyes. There is a figure standing over me. I can see the trace of blond locks dangling from her face.

"Mom," I whisper. I don't know if I said it, or if I thought it and she just heard me, but I feel a cool hand pressed to my cheek.

"Beatrice," she replies with a sigh through a shaky, somewhat sounding of a laugh. I can finally visibly see her. She looks the same just as she did when she died. Her skin is red and warm where the bullets shot her, but she is no longer bleeding. Next to her, my father stands, a red mark on the left side of his head near his temple turned into a scar. They both are wearing the same clothes I last saw them in.

"I'm sorry," I try to mutter, but my father shakes his head.

"Beatrice, there is power in self-sacrifice." He says.

"I love him." I don't know what made me decide to say it, but something did. I don't know whether I was afraid to admit it because I was afraid of personal devotion, or maybe because I was afraid if I loved someone else I would lose him. I couldn't let that happen – not to another person I cared so deeply for.

My mother pulls her hand down for me, and I accept. She pulls me to my feet and steadies me. Her eyes are soft and clear and forgiving. She is slightly white around where she has been shot, like it's faintly healing even though she is dead. My father already seems healed, and it looks like nothing in them has changed.

I hear the distant sounding of footsteps, and my mother catches her breath in her throat. "Beatrice, someone is coming."

A breath is caught in my throat as I choke back a sob. There lays Tobias on the ground, dressed in his Dauntless clothing.

"I want to get him." I tell my parents, but by the time I can speak a word they're gone. They're probably waiting for me.

Cautiously, I shuffle over to his body. My feet are light and I don't feel like I need to walk. Is this what it really feels like to be dead?

"Tobias," I whisper, knowing maybe he can hear me. But his eyes are shot open, and he seems to panic when he sees me. I shake my head microscopically.

"You're supposed to be alive." I say, but I stop when I see tears weld in his eyes. I reach my hand down, and pull him to his feet. He pulls me into his arms and rests his head against the crook of my neck. He's crying – I've never seen Tobias cry before, but I don't like it.

"I'm so sorry Tris." His voice sounds like his head has been muffled underwater. I can see colors blurring together in my vision, and I feel something wet streak down my cheek.

"Tobias, it's okay. I wasn't going to lose someone else that I loved." I finally can lift my eyes to his, a daring move that I think could either cause me to buckle to my knees or could send me on an emotional spree about love.

"You love me?" He asks with a quiver to his voice.

I wasn't sure of it, but I am not. I'm sure of loving him. I'm sure of wanting to be there for him. "I was just afraid to tell you, Tobias. I love the two people I loved most in the world, and I couldn't lose you."

Tobias fits his mouth to mine, words unable to be spoken by either one of us. When he breaks the kiss, he says in a mumble, "Jeanine's lackey shot me when I woke up. I saw your body and I fired the gun at Jeanine."

I shake my head in disbelief. "You woke up?"

He nods his head. "I'm Divergent. I'm sorry Tris; I tried to wake up sooner. I couldn't control what I was doing. I could hear you. But, if it makes you feel any better, Jeanine is dead."

Somehow, that makes me laugh a little. In Abnegation, you would never laugh over someone's death especially a high ranking government official, but this is war. It's probably even frowned upon in Dauntless, but then again they drank themselves to a disgusting hangover when Al jumped the chasm.

"Tobias, I don't care that you shot me. I don't care that Jeanine is dead." I don't mean my voice to come out to bitter. I allow myself a few seconds of composure before I can continue to speak to him. He still stares at me, his blue eyes twinkling. I missed that sight.

"I wasn't going to let you kill me. End of discussion."

Tobias nods his head, not wanting to go on any further. He intertwines his fingers with mine, and I press myself into his embrace. I died because I love him. And he knows it too.

Finally, after a few moments of silence, my parents appear behind me. Tobias gives them a gentle smile. "It's good to see you both again."

"Hello, Tobias." My mother says with a gentle soothing parental voice. My father shakes his hand, but his expression remains unclear.

"Thank you for protecting Beatrice," my father finally says, nearly choking on finding the right words to say.

Tobias nods his head. "You're welcome," he says, but he doesn't smile. He glances down at me, only before adding, "I love her."

There were many questions left unanswered, but that's okay. Shots were fired. My mother died protecting me. My father died so I could try to save Tobias. I died because I love Tobias. I wasn't going to lose someone else that I love. Now, the three people I love the most are here with me. Maybe someday Caleb will be too – I don't know. I know we'll forgive him, because he's my brother and I love him.

But the people I love most are here with me. And that's all I could ever ask for.

**_A/N – Not sorry for screwing with your feels :D_**

******_Love all my initiates!_**

******_~Leigh _**


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